Love
by x.Sess.x.Satan.x
Summary: Human love, cat love, mechanoid love, computer love...it's all good!rnFINISHED at long last! Yes!
1. Disease

**Disclaimer:** OK, I'm sick of writing these so I'm just going to do one and it will last the entire fanfic, OK? I DO NOT OWN RED DWARF OR ANY OF IT'S CHARACTERS.

**Author's note:** I know this is kinda soon after finishing the last one, but I'm excited. I prefer writing in this format, more like 'Nicole' - do you know how hard it is to write "**Currylover169: **logoff" over and over again??? Anyway, this is set twelve years after 'Changes' please R&R and enjoy!

Nicole looked up at Rimmer. He sat delicately at the side of their bed and put her soup down on the side cabinet. He gently swept his hand across her forehead--it was burning hot. Even though Nikki was the ill one, Rimmer believed he felt more wretched than she did. It tore at his heart to see her looking so weak and defenseless. Her face was as pale as a ghost and the dark rings around her eyes looked heavy. As he slipped his hand down into hers he was shocked by the stark contrast of temperatures between her boiling hot cheeks and freezing cold fingers. He knew it was a stupid question but there really wasn't anything else he could say.   
"Are you feeling alright?" As soon as the words came out of his mouth he regretted it. Of course she wasn't feeling alright, he could tell just by a glance. She, however, just nodded slowly. Rimmer couldn't help but give a tiny laugh. She was practically on death's door and still she was trying to protect his feelings by making out things were OK. It was times like this Rimmer loved. Well, obviously not exactly like this, he didn't love that his wife, his favourite person in the entire universe, was harbouring an all-consuming disease which Kryten, despite all his confidence and reassurance, had still not found a cure for. No, it wasn't that he loved. It was being with her, being there to comfort her. It took him back to the first few weeks of their relationship, when he had savoured every moment of being with her, because he never knew if she would turn and stay with Lister. He had been overjoyed when she had said 'I love you' to him for the first time. Now she couldn't speak at all.   
The disease, what ever it was, had reached her throat and her vocal chords; her throat started to swell and her vocal chords were disrupted; she was rendered speechless. She, Rimmer and everyone else aboard the ship knew full well that time was running out to find an antidote for the virus - if the swelling became too great, she would lose her oxygen supply - but nobody dared voice it. She was being sick almost every hour, her arms were covered with a purple rash, her hair was starting to fall out, and, perhaps most importantly, she had lost the use of her legs. Possibly permanently. Every time Rimmer went to visit her he promised himself he wouldn't cry.   
He looked at the two rings - wedding and engagement - sitting desolately on the bedside cabinet. As her hands had started to swell, she had had to take off any jewelry. She had begged to keep the rings on, but Kryten and Rimmer both persuaded her to remove them; if her finger had swollen any more, the rings would have cut off the blood supply, and may have even caused gangrene.   
Rimmer blinked back a tear and smiled weakly at her, "Kryten says he's nearly found the antidote," he lied, "You'll be better in no time."


	2. Jesse

**Disclaimer:** I don't own them blah blah blah

**Author's note:** Well,I certainly have contradicted my 'update fast' rule! There are a number of reasons why I have taken so long: Writer's block; problems (which I'm sure you're all too aware of!); boyfriend trouble; but I'm OK now and ready to write!!!

Lister rapped on the door of the bathroom, "Are you OK?"  
"Yes," Kochanski said weakly as she took her head out of the toilet. Damned morning sickness; why wouldn't it leave her alone?  
"Good, well, when you're done in there, we've got a bit of a situation out here," he said, shifting the position of Charlotte in his arms and dragging the bag of nappies towards him with his foot.  
"Can't you take care of it?" Kochanski asked, holding back her hair in both hands as another wave of nausea swept over her.  
"Oh, OK," Lister said reluctantly. Every time Rimmer went to visit Nicole, Charlotte was left in the hands of Lister and Kochanski. At first they had insisted on letting Kryten take care of her as he was much more capable, but Rimmer didn't fancy the idea of a sanitation droid looking after what would probably be his only child, and since Kochanski had got pregnant they had all agreed it was the best thing to do. Kochanski's pregnancy was a shock to everyone; unlike Rimmer and Nicole they hadn't planned it. But even though they had their qualms, deep down both parties were more than ready to have children, they'd just never voiced it in fear that the other would say 'no'.

Now, for the first time, Lister was having second thoughts about the baby - if he couldn't cope with a couple of hours each day, how was he going to cope with a lifetime? The answer came when he looked down at Charlotte. She stopped crying and yawned, stretching out her little arms and fingers, then made a soft burbling sound. Lister's heart jumped - even though she was the spawn of Rimmer, she was so cute. He could handle being a father, he told himself, it will be hard work, but it'll all be worth it. He smiled as she yawned again and rubbed her eye with her tiny little fist.

_BANG!  
_No, thought Kryten as he cleared up the smashed glass, that's not the right combination either.  
He was still trying to find the antidote to Nicole's virus. He had narrowed it down to a mixture of phenylpropanolamine, chlorpheniramine maleate, and sodium dodecyl. There was one other ingredient that needed to be added, but there was a problem. Kryten had narrowed this missing ingredient down to one of two things: either sodium dihydrogen, or lauric acid. If the other ingredient had been sodium dihydrogen there would be no problem - the science lab storerooms had stackloads of the stuff lying dormant. But, true to form, the Red Dwarf crew couldn't get the simple answer. As Kryten had poured the first drop of sodium dihydrogen into the solution, most of the equipment had smashed or gone up in flames. So now they had a problem. A serious problem. They didn't have any lauric acid. Lauric acid was mainly used with naturalistic and herbal remedies, but the Space Corps. had eliminated the practice of these medicines, so the supply of lauric acid was sparse. Their only hope was to scavenge the next derelict they came across that _wasn't_ Space Corps. registered and pray they had some on board. Kryten stomped out the last fire and set off towards the drive room to set co-ordinates.

Holly saw the shimmering glitter of the silver planet, illuminated by the newly formed sun and smiled. She had been waiting patiently for months on end for signs of life - ever since Nicole had become pregnant she had wanted children (or more correctly, computer algorithms) but there hadn't been a male computer around to download his jurisdiction, the computer equivalent of giving sperm. The crew had been becoming irritated with her obsessive need to stare into space just waiting for a ship that may or may not come along; particularly Rimmer who felt his wife's illness was somewhat more of a priority. Holly reluctantly started spending more time on trying to cure Nicole, and eventually stopped searching for spacecrafts altogether.  
But then Kryten had announced that they needed to find a ship or a derelict to retrieve the missing ingredient, and Holly had leapt at the opportunity. Rimmer was still convinced that she was accepting this responsibility more for her personal gain than for Nicole, but, needs must.  
If computers had had hearts, Holly's would have been racing as she waited for the planet to come into close enough range to scan the surface. She watched it intently for three solid hours. Red Dwarf even had a near-miss encounter with a meteorite she was so enraptured by it. When they were finally in range she couldn't help but give a little squeal of excitement. She scanned the surface for an hour and a half. Thoroughly. Twice. No luck. But, as they got even closer to the planet, she noticed a tiny black speck between two of the many mountains that dotted the landscape. On a risky closer inspection, which almost lost Red Dwarf the use of its thrusters, she discovered it was a ship…with an operational mainframe! It had a computer!

Holly eagerly tried to handshake with the craft, but to no avail. She tried again. And again. Her patience and hope were both running thin. She tried one last time, and a face materialized next to hers.  
"Hello, I'm Jesse, computer of the passenger ship, the Bella-Jude IV," came a voice. Holly was too stunned to reply. She stared at the handsome male computer - he was perfect: his skin-tone was milky, but not pale; his eyes were relaxed but not tired; his voice was husky, but not unclear. She calculated a 98.75 percent compatibility rating and instantly began imagining what their children would be like.  
Holly was woken from her reverie with a jolt as she realised she was still trying to handshake with him. She frantically shut it off and smiled apologetically at Jesse.  
"Hello," she finally found her voice, "I'm Holly, computer of the Jupiter Mining Vessel, Red Dwarf."  
"Holly," Jesse echoed, "What a pretty name…"

She could have said anything. Absolutely anything at all. She could have mentioned Nicole and the virus. She could have explained how they rescued Kryten. She could even have told him about Rimmer. _Anything_ would have been better than what she actually _did_ say:  
"I used to be a man."  
_Oh. Smegging. Hell._ And that was it. As far as Holly was concerned she had lost her one chance to have children, and her one chance to provide an antidote for Nikki. But Jesse just laughed, "I had a computer friend who did that. Turned nasty, though. The top part of her face was male, whilst the bottom half remained female!"  
Holly laughed along with him, relishing the moment.  
"But you," Jesse continued more seriously, "You look…great. You did a really good job, there."  
Before that day, Holly couldn't believe it was possible to fall in love at first sight. But now…


	3. Computer love

**Author's note:** A short but fairly heavy chapter. Sorry that it's taken so long, I've been taking mock exams for the last two weeks (it feels like the last two millennia!) Anyway, enjoy!

"So," Holly said after a long chat with Jesse, "How did you wind up in deep space?"  
"Oh, long story. You see, we were attacked by these weird simulant type things--"  
"We?"  
"Yes, we. There tends to be more than just one computer on a ship," Jesse replied cheekily.  
"Of course. Carry on."  
"So, anyway, they just went nuts. Half of the crew were killed. The other half fled. The simulants ran riot on the ship; disabled my navigation drives and completely took over. Finally they got bored and left. It was lucky they left when they did. If they had stayed for a couple of days longer they would have met Ginny and probably killed her."  
"Who's Ginny?"  
"Ginny Carver. She was a maintenance worker on the Bella-Jude IV. The captain had given her permission to go down to Io and register as Head of Sanitation a few days before the abduction. She got back to find she was the last remaining crew member and immediately spiraled into depression. She moped about for weeks whilst I tried to reboot myself, and all the while the ship was drifting further into deep space. Then, one drunken night, Ginny put herself into suspended animation."  
"Wow," Holly said wistfully, enraptured by the story, "So then what happened?"

"Well, years later, I managed to reload myself to find I was completely alone except for two detectable lifeforms. The first I soon found out was Ginny in a stasis booth, and the second was a series 2000 mechanoid called Vitani who had previously belonged to the simulants. She was very badly damaged and all her data files were corrupted. I devoted the next two and a half million years to rebuilding her unsuccessfully, before deciding it was time for some other company. I let Ginny out of stasis and explained the situation."  
"And how did she take it?"  
"Not too well. For a few days she kept threatening to eject herself into space. I'm sure it was worse than when you told Lister."  
Holly just nodded. She didn't mention that, actually, for weeks after telling him he was alone in space, Lister wandered round in a drunken stupor. She wanted to hear the rest of the story.  
"But then I introduced her to Vitani and suddenly her life had meaning. She took the mechanoid under her wing and gave her patient tuition, teaching her how to behave and how to receive instruction. Vitani's now a treasured member of the crew. I don't know what we would do without her. Granted, she can't pass anything magnetic without her optical systems overheating. But what she doesn't know about space travel isn't worth knowing. I know we may be a dysfunctional group, but we get along most of the time, just like your crew, I'm sure--"  
Holly snorted.  
"--and we would absolutely adore joining your ship and meeting your shipmates."

"You talk a good talk," said Holly, admiringly, "and we would love to have you aboard."  
Jesse smiled.  
"Just one quick question," Holly added, "do you have any lauric acid?"  
"Are you asking me out?" Jesse asked after a pause.  
"Oh, no, one of our crewmembers is sick, and we need lauric acid."  
Jesse apologized and checked. When he came back he happily informed Holly that they did have lauric acid.  
"Yes!" she cried, "Oh, thank you, I love you!"  
There was an awkward pause.  
"Well, I mean," she started to babble, "not in that way, I mean you're very nice I'm sure, but we hardly know each other and I don't LOVE you, I just think you're nice and I don't love you. In that way, anyway."  
_Shut up, Holly, shut up, Holly.  
_"Actually, Hol, I think I'm in love with you…"  
_Wow…_


	4. Cat love

**Author's note:** Sorry for the long wait! I havesuffered from a severe case of writer's block. Forgive me if this chapter is really rubbish, but I'm tired and grumpy and I just wanted to get it finished today. I'm not sure if there will be another chapter up until after Xmas, so if there isn't:  
_MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!_

"Another service mechanoid," Kryten mumbled with more than a hint of resentment. The crew of the Bella-Jude IV had been aboard the Red Dwarf for just under a week, and Kryten still hadn't agreed to meet Vitani.  
"I would have thought you'd be pleased," Holly replied, "A bit of extra help around the place wouldn't go amiss."  
Kryten slumped in the chair. A bit of extra help most certainly _would_ go amiss! For him, anyway. He had always prided himself on his cleaning abilities, and now this other robot had been brought in. It was like Hudzen 10 all over again. What if this android was betetr than he was? What if she knew things about tile cleaner that he didn't? And, according to Holly, who really wasn't helping, she was installed with a space travel chip. Kryten wasn't. Kryten had had to learn from Lister and Rimmer. The process had been long, to say the least. He had studied a bit himself and was able to get out of tricky situations, but he was sure that this new droid would be able to do that _with ease_. That was what scared him. She would take over, he would be rendered useless and probably be dismantled. If he wasn't a mechanoid, Kryten was sure it would make him feel sick to the stomach.

"Look," Holly consoled him, "if it helps, Vitani--"  
"Oh, it has a name?" Kryten interrupted indignantly.  
"If you're going to be like this, I'm leaving. Jesse and I are going on a date tonight!" She winked and dissolved off the screen.  
"What sort of a name is 'Vitani' anyway?" Kryten muttered.  
"While we're on the subject, what kind of a name is 'Kryten'?"  
Kryten turned to see Rimmer at the door. He had the biggest smile on his face.  
"It worked, Krytie! Nikki's feeling better already! She's getting some colour back and her temperature has dropped dramatically. She should make a full recovery in little more than a week! Can you believe it?"  
"But, I haven't even made the formula yet," Kryten said confused.  
"Vitani did it," Rimmer said casually, "Anyway, I'm off to pick up Charlotte." And he left, leaving Kryten feeling three inches tall.

* * *

Rimmer entered Ginny Carver's quarters and was surprised to see Cat bottle-feeding Charlotte. Usually the Cat would stay well clear of the baby for the sake of his pristine suits, and it was a bit of a surprise for Rimmer to see him actually taking care of her. Then again, the Cat would bend over backwards for Ginny Carver. Everyone could see he was fully in love with her, but he fiercely denied it - cats did NOT fall in love.  
"Er, hi," Rimmer said pathetically. The Cat looked up and smiled showing off his pearly whites.  
"Hey Goal-Post Head! I'm taking care of your daughter, look!" He spoke slowly and deliberately, with several cursory glances in Ginny's direction.  
"Yes, I can see that," Rimmer replied.  
"How's Nicole?" Ginny asked quietly.  
"Oh, she's fine, we think. She's dying to meet everyone, especially you."  
Ginny blushed. She wasn't used to attention - she was a lowly maintenance worker, no one important. 

As a child she had been very shy, a real introvert. She kept herself to herself. Even talking to her own sisters was a rare event. She didn't like making friends, so, consequently, led a very sad and lonely life. When she had wanted to join the Bella Jude IV, she had had to go through training, and part of the course was an assessment of teamwork. She had tried so very hard to co-operate and just managed to pass, but after that, she went back to her old, silent self. Once aboard the Bella Jude IV, she found herself surrounded by people and it scared her no end. She avoided communication wherever she could but soon discovered it was impossible to do a good job to work properly if you didn't talk to people, and advancing in her career was what she dreamed of more than anything. So she became determined to be more of an extrovert. It had resulted in a fit of depression at first, but once she passed the mental block, she was actually rather charming.

Meeting Rimmer had certainly helped. They were very similar - both had become over-obsessed by their careers; both had gone pretty much nowhere; both had been almost social outcasts. The only difference was that Rimmer had learnt from his experiences and built on them, whereas Ginny had preferred to stick to one way. Now she was more prepared to be more outgoing, and to hell with what people thought. As Rimmer put it, "if I hadn't done stuff because I cared what other people thought of me, I wouldn't have moved an inch my entire life."

For the first couple of days aboard Red Dwarf, Ginny wondered whether she might have had a bit of a crush on Rimmer, but she dismissed it. Even if it were true, she was more fond of the Cat anyway. She looked at him cradling Charlotte and wondered if she saw a hint of affection on his face as he gazed down at the baby. Rimmer noticed it too.  
"If you want to keep her for the rest of the night it might be OK," he dropped in casually, but with meaning, "Nikki's coming back tonight and it may be better if Charlotte was taken care of by someone else. Until she's feeling strong enough to take care of her herself."  
"I think we could do that," Ginny smiled.  
"We?" Cat asked, "Who's 'we'?"  
"Me and you, silly!" Ginny poked him playfully.  
"Oh, OK!" Cat said, relieved he had got the mental image of Ginny and Rimmer out of his head.

* * *

Kryten knocked on the cupboard door stiffly. Vitani opened it and smiled, "You must be Kryten," she said warmly, "I've heard so much about you!"  
"And I you," Kryten said monotonously eyeing her up and down. Lister had persuaded him to visit the new mech, and, despite her being rather pretty for a lump of metal, he was determined to be sulky and miserable throughout the entire affair.  
"I was hoping you would drop by," Vitani continued, "Er, come on in."  
Kryten plodded into the tiny space.  
"I've been trying to recreate this cleaner," she said holding up a bottle. Kryten recognized it immediately - it was the same stuff he had been perfecting for almost three years.  
"I was wondering if you could tell me the secret ingredient, I just can't figure it out! I mean I'm a service droid by name but my real strength is in space travel. How ironic is that!"  
"Very," Kryten muttered sarcastically, then raised his voice a little, "Well, it's quite simple, actually. You just take one lemon and a teaspoon of bicarbonate of soda…I've said enough." Kryten turned away.  
"Kryten, do you not like me?"  
Kryten turned back.  
"I would prefer not to answer that if you don't mind," he turned away again and made his way to the door, "Goodnight."  
The door slid shut behind him.  
"Goodbye," Vitani said quietly. She couldn't quite believe the 97.2 percent compatibility rating she had calculatedfrom that one brief and rather unromantic encounter. 


	5. Understanding

**Author's note:** Good God, this is hard, this fanfiction! Thankyou so so so so so so much _lar-ton _for agreeing to help me, it is much appreciated!!! I was on the verge of suicidal depression! Well, maybe not that much, but, you know, pretty bad. I managed to do this chapter, but I may call upon you for the next.  
Anyway, I hope this is good, because I haven't had a chance to proof-read it, I was so desperate to post it! If it's no good, don't tell me! Just joking, tell me what you thought. And also, can you tell me which specific lines you most liked, because I spend a lot of time coming up with some of the gags in these things and never get any feedback from you :( so please tell me!!!

"You can do it!" Rimmer said with outstretched arms, "Come on, walk over to me! You can do it! You can walk, I know you can!"  
Nicole gripped the rail tightly, "Arn, I can't! This is impossible!"  
"It's not! You're doing so well!"  
"I've only taken one step!"  
Rimmer's arms dejectedly dropped to his side in a defeated way, "Maybe we can try again tomorrow."  
"No," Nicole said firmly, "there's no point. We might as well face it; I'm never going to get the use of my legs back."  
Rimmer walked over to her and helped her back into the wheelchair.  
"I'm going to get you on your feet again," he said determinedly, "I promise you, you will walk again."  
Nicole sighed. She wanted to believe him.

Kryten waddled erratically down one of Red Dwarf's many winding corridors. He couldn't believe the changes around the ship since Vitani had joined. She had managed to update the computer system so the Dwarf was four times faster; Starbugs 1, 2, 3 and 4 now had laser canon capability; and the scanners were improved to enhance the images. Kryten deeply resented her actions. He knew it was hard for him to hate her because that was his nature - he tried to accept everyone for who they were (until recently, Mister Rimmer had been an exception) - but he couldn't learn to like her. He just couldn't. He knew it was petty and immature, but he was totally jealous of her, and if he couldn't be Head Mechanoid then he wasn't going to talk to the robot that was. And that was final.

Cat, conversely, spent every spare second he could with Ginny. And if he wasn't with her, then he was talking about her. And because Kris was the only one who couldn't run away from it (her pregnancy was well into its seventh month and she was too heavy to lug herself around the place) she was getting rather sick of it.  
"Cat," she said after one particularly boring recount of his day with her, "If you like this girl so much, then why don't you just ask her out?"  
"Because," Cat began, "She might say no!"  
Kris made a noise and went over to her computer.  
"What are you doing?" Cat asked.  
"I'm ISMing Nikki, Vitani and Holly. Maybe a little girl power will knock some sense into you."  
Vitani hadsaid she wasbusy and wasn't able to join them, but half an hour later, Holly and Nicole had both arrived. Once Kris had told them what Cat had just told her, they immediately started laying into him.  
"Cat!" Nicole cried, "That is absolutely unacceptable dating behaviour."  
"Really?" Cat asked timidly.  
"Really. As a rule I shouldn't really say this to you, but you're being such a soft git…Ginny is crazy about you," Cat's jaw dropped.  
"It's obvious," Holly joined in, "you spend all your time together, and neither of you will shut up about the other."  
"Wow…" Cat was learning a lot here.  
"Wow, indeed," Kris said, "This is a typical guy reaction."  
"Yeah, absolutely," Nikki confirmed, "As soon as things smell a little of seriousness, its 'what if this' and 'what if that'. It's pathetic."  
"All we want," Holly said, "is for a great guy to come along, sweep us off our cables and tell us they love us. Is that really too much to ask?"  
"Well…" Cat began, but was interrupted by Kris.  
"I know! It's like, when I found out I was pregnant, Dave was cagey and hardly spoke at all. But I knew that he wanted kids! It was just as a male, he had been programmed to resent it!"  
"Yeah," Nicole agreed, "When I first suggested to Arnie about telling Dave that we were an item, he actually lost the ability to form words!"  
"Men like to think they are in control," Holly said, "Guys like Jesse and Rimmer and Lister…well, they're few and far between."  
Cat found he wanted to put forward an argument against everything they were saying - defend mankind a little. But as soon as he got an available moment to get a word in, he didn't have that argument. He had to agree. Men were bastards.

"Actually," Holly continued after she had had time to think, "they're not. They just have to find the right girl."  
This was greeted by a curious silence from everyone in the room.  
"I mean," she explained, "take Rimmer. Before Nikki he wouldn't have known commitment if it had punched him in the face. And Lister. He was adamantly against marriage and dedication until Kris came along. Then suddenly, within a year, he's engaged and expecting two children."  
"You're so right…" Kris said wistfully, "He never stops telling me that he loves me. I am so lucky to have him."  
"Yeah, Arnie is so sweet to me, and always has been. Just this morning he was helping me walk; trying to get me out of this thing," Nikki indicated the wheelchair, "It's just his way to be a little skittish."  
"So," Cat finally spoke, "What should I do? Should I go for it?"  
No one spoke, but Kris tipped her head to one side.  
"What?" Cat said defensively, "I've never done this before! I'm nervous…"  
"Aw..!" came three unisonous voices.  
"Thanks," Cat said sarcastically, "You're really helping."  
"Sorry," Nicole apologized, "It's just so adorable. Ginny will be lucky to have you, you know."  
"You…you think I should do it?"  
"Duh!" came all three voices again.

Vitani wanted to cry so much. And if she wasn't a mechanoid she would have been crying. Why didn't Kryten see it? She wasn't sure if she was in love with him, but she did know that she wanted to spend more time with him. Get to know him better. But he was being so damn stubborn! She wondered if his defensive behaviour was his way of hiding his true feelings. Maybe he _did_ think of her in that way, he just refused to believe it. She sighed. Maybe she would never find out.

Cat strode confidently down the corridor to Ginny's quarters. He rapped at the door and she answered, her long, dark hair curling down to her waist. She looked up at him with her gorgeous hazel eyes. Cat put his hands on her shoulders and pulled her close to his chest.  
"Ginny, baby," he said smoothly, "I love you, and always have. I want to be with you more than anything. I think about you every day, and every night I dream about you. You are my heart, my soul, my everything. Please say you feel the same way."  
For a moment there was silence as Ginny looked deep into his eyes.  
"Oh, Cat…" she whispered and kissed him passionately. She threw her arms around his neck and spoke gently into his ear, "I love you, too."

Cat kept this scenario firmly in his mind as he wandered nervously to her door. He walked on autopilot, with no awareness of anything around him. At one point he stopped. This was crazy! He was a cat, and cats didn't fall in love! But he kept going, nevertheless. By the time he reached her door, he couldn't feel his knees. His hand knocked on the door. He panicked. What in the hell was he going to say to her? He played the scene again in his head to try to remember his opener. _Ginny, baby. Ginny, baby. Ginny, baby._ She opened the door and smiled up at him.  
"H-h-hi, G-g-ginny."  
Good one.  
"Cat!" she seemed genuinely pleased to see him, despite his dodgy greeting, "How are you?"  
Cat reached down and took her hands in his. It was then he first noticed they were incredibly sweaty.  
"G-ginny, I… I want to say, uh, that…th-that, I…" Cat grimaced. This was _nothing_ like he'd imagined it.  
"Cat?" Ginny cupped his face in her hand, "Are you…asking me out?"  
Cat just nodded. Ginny wrapped her arms around his waist and pressed into him. Cat was caught off-guard and for a long time didn't do anything. But then he realised that this was her way of saying 'yes'. She was far too timid to actually say it. Cat was amazed at his own sense of understanding.  
Ginny was panicking. She was hugging him but he wasn't hugging back. Was she being too subtle? What did she have to do to show him that she wanted to be with him? But then he hugged her back and she sighed with relief. He understood.

Cat left that evening one seriously satisfied moggy. Holly appeared on one of the various monitors that dotted the ship.  
"How'd it go?"  
"Uh…OK," Cat said, uncharacteristically quietly. Holly smiled.  
"So, how'd you ask her?"  
Cat scrunched up his face. He didn't want to think about it.  
"That bad?" Holly asked, "Well, it can't have been _very_ awful. She said yes, didn't she?"  
"I guess," Cat agreed.  
"So, tell me!" Holly persisted. He realised she wasn't going to let it go until he told her, so he did.  
"Oh, that is amazing!" Holly said surprisingly cheerily.  
"What?"  
"That is the perfect way to ask someone out."  
Cat clearly needed an explanation.  
"She knew you were sincere! If you had been all, 'Ginny, baby, I love you and always have,'" she imitated, "she's gonna wonder why you haven't already asked her. Believe me, there's nothing worse than a phony."  
Cat sighed with relief. He understood.


	6. Doubts

**Author's note:** Quite a sweet chapter, though not as sweet as the next one! That's right, I'm finally over my writer's block!! Yahoo! _Lar-ton_, I'm sorry, but I don't think I need any help with this fic any more, but I would love love love to write another with you!!! Please..?  
Anyway, R&R as always, and enjoy!

Nicole wheeled herself into the quarters she shared with her family. She saw her husband sitting dejectedly on the edge of the bed, head propped up in his hands.  
"Hi," she said quietly. He looked up and smiled feebly at her. Nicole sighed, "I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have snapped at you. I realise now you were only trying to help. And…I'm willing to try again."  
Rimmer looked up, "Really?"  
Nicole nodded and smiled, "I know you only do these things because you love me. It's only recently I've learnt to appreciate it."  
Rimmer smiled and walked over to her. He knelt down beside her and kissed her softly.  
"We'll try again tomor-" his words were cut off by Charlotte screaming from the next room. He sighed, "I'll get it."  
"No," Nicole replied, "It's OK, I can do it."  
"Are you sure?" Rimmer said uneasily, "You've only been out of the Medibay for a month."  
"I can do it," she repeated. He opened his mouth to say something back, but instead he stepped to one side to let her through. She wheeled herself into the room with ease, and four minutes later the crying had stopped. She could do it, Rimmer said to himself, she could walk again.

Lister paced in his room. He had ISMed Rimmer and Kryten. He was panicking. Kochanski had just hit the eight month mark and Lister was beginning to doubt his skills as a father.  
"I'm freaking out!" he yelled at the unsuspecting Rimmer as he walked through the door.  
"W-what? About what?" Rimmer stammered, confused.  
"The twins! What the hell was I thinking, being a father? Me? A father? Can you imagine worse role model?"  
"Er…"  
"_Twins_, Rimmer! Smeggin' _twins_!" Lister emphasised his point by flailing his arms around the room, "I mean, I know I said I always wanted a family but…now it's happening…"  
Kryten shuffled into the room, "Why the emergency meeting, sirs?"  
Rimmer covered his ears before the inevitable…  
"TWINS!"

It took almost half an hour for Rimmer and Kryten to calm Lister down. And even then he was still on the edge.  
"What am I going to do?" he asked solemnly, "the birth is in _two months_, guys! I'm not ready!"  
"You may think you're not ready," Rimmer started, "But actually, you maybe are. I was the same, Lister. About a month before Nik went into labour I thought, 'what the smeg am I smegging doing? I'm not ready to be a _father_!' But when the day comes…" he sighed, remembering.  
"I don't know…"  
"You just wait," Rimmer said conclusively, "You wait until your boys look at you for the first time. When they first yawn. When they first smile. And when they grab your finger, it takes their whole fist," Lister still didn't look particularly convinced, "You'll see."


	7. Bexley for a girl

**Author's note: **Awwwwwwww! Sorry for the really rubbish A/n but it's all I can say. Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!

As Kochanski walked towards the Rimmers' quarters, she could feel something wasn't right. The pains in her stomach had been getting steadily worse, and closer together. But she carried on nevertheless - she was only seven months pregnant, she couldn't possibly be giving birth _now_. There was no way. However, when she got to her destination, she was close to unconsciousness. She was breathing heavily, she was extremely dizzy, and the pains in her stomach were almost too much to bear. She had just enough energy to knock once on the door.  
"Oh my God!" Rimmer exclaimed as he opened the door to her.  
"What is it?" Nicole asked from behind him. Rimmer hauled Kochanski up onto his shoulders and dragged her over to the bed. Nicole gasped at the state she was in.  
"What the hell's happening?" she heard Rimmer ask. She wheeled herself over to her and saw she was sitting in a wet puddle.  
"Smegging hell…" she whispered.  
"What?" Rimmer shouted in a flurry of panic, "What's wrong?"  
"She's…she's in labour," she said bluntly, pulling herself together. Her tone changed to a more urgent one, "She's in labour, the babies are coming! Hol? Holly?"  
Holly appeared on the screen, "What? What's the fuss?"  
"Kris's water's just broken, we need Kryten up here, now!"  
"OK, get her down to the Medibay-"  
"There isn't time!" she yelled, "She must be eight centimetres gone already! Get Kryten!"  
Holly disappeared from the screen.  
"She can't be!" Rimmer said desperately, "It isn't time yet!"  
"Try telling that to Jim and Bexley," she replied, trying to get Kris into a more comfortable position, "They ain't gonna wait."

Rimmer took all the pillows and piled them up on top of each other. Nicole helped him prop Kochanski up against them.  
"What's happening?" Kris spoke for the first time.  
"It's OK, Kris," Nicole soothed her, "the babies are coming, just relax and it'll be over soon, OK?"  
"Where's…Dave?" She said between gulps of air.  
"Coming," Nicole said. She hoped Holly had had the sense to inform Lister while she was getting Kryten.  
"Ow, it hurts!"  
"I know, honey, I know," Nicole tried to calm her, "Arn, can you hold her hand?"  
"What?"  
"Trust me, I've been through this, I know what she wants. Hold her hand!"  
Rimmer reluctantly slipped his hand into Kris's. She squeezed back. Hard. Nicole urgently shook her head at him - he wasn't to scream. He bit his lip and took deep breaths. He hoped Lister would be there soon.

"Oh, Christ," Nicole whispered.  
"What?" Rimmer and Kochanski asked in unison. Nicole looked at her apologetically.  
"They're not going to wait any longer, Kris. You going to have to start pushing."  
"What!?" she yelled.  
"Are you sure?" Rimmer asked.  
"Positive. One of the heads is crowning."  
"But Kryten's not here yet!" Rimmer whimpered.  
"For God's sake, Arnold, leave the worrying to me! I'm going to have to play mid-wife."  
"Do you know what you're doing?"  
"Arnold…" Nicole said threateningly. Rimmer turned timidly back to Kochanksi and brushed the hair off her face. Nicole shrugged off her jacket and laid it down ready for the first of the twins. She assumed, and hoped, that Kryten would be there by the time the second was born.  
"Ready?"  
"Yes."  
"When I say so, push as hard as you can, OK?"  
"OK."  
"Ready…and…push!"  
Kris pushed for all she was worth.  
"It's not enough, Kris!" Nicole said loudly.  
Kris pushed even harder.  
"OK, good, we're getting somewhere! Keep it up! And…relax."  
Kris fell back on the pillows in relief.  
"Rest as much as you can, the next one should be in about fifteen seconds."  
"How do you know all this?" Rimmer asked in admiration. Nicole just shrugged as she wiped her hands on her jeans. She didn't have time to explain about a mix-up in application forms on Jupiter and being sent to Saturn to take a medical course instead of a navigation course on Earth.  
"OK, Kris, ready?"  
Kris groaned - did she really have to do it again?  
"Push!"  
Evidently, yes.

Lister burst into the room.  
"Is she OK?"  
"She's fine," Rimmer replied, "You can take her hand now, can't you?"  
Lister nodded, took his fiancée's hand in his and grimaced.  
_She's feeling more pain than you are, don't scream, don't scream.  
_"Right," Nicole took charge, "Arn, now you're free, get some towels and a bowl of - you can relax now Kris - and a bowl of warm water."  
He scampered off to do so.  
"Ready to push again?"  
"But I just finished the last one!"  
"Sorry, you can't tell the baby to wait. Ready?"  
Lister helped her get into position.  
"Push!"  
Kryten entered at the same moment that Holly and Jesse appeared on the screen. They watched as little Jim was eased out of his mother. And Kryten was off: "Oh, ma'am, he's so beautiful! You're so lucky! He's so tiny!"  
"That's really helpful, Kryten," Nicole interrupted, "but do you think you could actually deliver the next one?"  
"Oh, of course, ma'am. And might I congratulate you, ma'am, on such a fine delivery yourself-"  
"Congratulate me later, Krytes, Kris kinda needs you right now."  
Rimmer ran back in with three white towels and a large bowl of warm water, vast amounts of which had spilled down his uniform.  
"Got them," he said breathlessly. He saw the new baby cradled in his wife's arms and gasped, "Oh, he's born! Lister, he looks just like you."  
"Really?" Lister asked disappointedly.  
Vitani slid gracefully into the room, "Holly and Jesse sent for me," she announced. Kryten looked up and then snapped his head in the computers' direction. Jesse gave the facial equivalent of a shrug whilst Holly smiled.  
"Just thought you could use the help," Jesse explained.  
"I can cope just fine by myself," he said huffily, "Miss Vitani, I'm sorry but your services are not required."  
Vitani slunk into a corner whilst Kris screamed blue murder.

"Are you ready to push again, ma'am?" Kryten asked.  
"As I'll ever be," she sighed.  
As she started pushing for what felt like the umpteenth time, Cat and Ginny rushed in.  
"There you…what's going on?" Ginny enquired.  
"The twins are premature," Vitani said.  
"The twins are premmy-what?" Cat asked, confused.  
"Premature," Vitani repeated, "They're being born too early."  
"Oh my God!" Ginny yelled ecstatically, "What a fantastic day! First I get engaged, then the twins are bor-"  
"What!?" came several voices at once.  
"Oh, that's right," Ginny said as though she'd forgotten. She lifted up her left hand to reveal a sparkling ring, "I'm engaged!"  
"To Cat?" Rimmer asked pointlessly.

But before anyone could respond to this impossibly stupid remark, Kryten gave a yelp.  
"What," asked Lister, worried, "What's happening down there?" he cringed at his inappropriate use of words.  
"It's…it's a…_girl_, ma'am," Kryten said, bewildered.  
"What?" Lister asked.  
"I don't understand," Kochanski said, "The…the sonogram said they were boys. Twin boys."  
"Well, it's pretty clear, ma'am. It is a girl."  
"Kryten must've read the sonogram wrong," Holly explained.  
"Honey," Jesse said slowly, "You were the one that read the sonogram, remember?"  
"Well then _I_…must have…anyway."  
"I suppose you'll have to think of a different name for her," Vitani said, looking up from Jim who was cradled in Rimmer's arms.  
"Oh, I don't know," Nicole mused, "I quite like 'Bexley' for a girl."  
"Bexley for a girl?" Rimmer asked unimpressed.  
"Actually, it's not too bad," Lister agreed.  
"Yeah, I like it!" Holly said.  
"Little Girl Bexley," Kochanski cooed as she took her daughter from Kryten, "I like it, too!"

Lister took his sleeping daughter from his sleeping fiancée and put her down next to his sleeping son.  
"Goodnight," he whispered to all three of them.


	8. Problems

**Author's note:** Sorry I haven't posted for a while - severe coursework deadlines which aren't going to diminish, so this might be the last chapter for a while. R&R as always, and enjoy! (By the way, the Esperanto scene at the beginning IS Esperanto, but only loosely translated 'cos I couldn't find a decent translator without having to wait twenty minutes for some component to be installed. Grrr… Also, the trouble Rimmer has with Esperanto is taken directly from the trouble I have with Spanish…lol)

"Pet esti tiele je oka," Nicole recited. Rimmer paced the floor, racking his brain.  
"Um…um, don't tell me, I know this, I do….um…"  
"Do you need some help?"  
"No! I can do it!"  
Nicole sighed. He was improving, there was no doubt - he could recognize most of the regular verbs, one irregular verb, and was almost capable of identifying various adjectives. But he was poor with nouns and sentence structure, so found whole phrases hard to decipher.  
"Oh!" he said triumphantly, "Oh, I know it! Please…er, please…be there…what was the rest?"  
"Je oka."  
"At…at…"  
"We did numbers the other week, remember?"  
"Unu, du, tri…kvar, kvin, ses, sep, oka…oka! Eight! Please be there at eight!"  
"Yes!"  
"I did it? I worked out a sentence? A whole sentence?"  
"You did!"  
"Oh my God, I did! And it's all because of you," he looked in her eyes, "Incredible, amazing, gorgeous, you."  
"It wasn't…"  
"It was. I'd been learning this language for ten years, and I could barely even say 'hello'. Now I can say… 'mi ami vi'…"  
Nicole smiled. She had always thought 'I love you' sounded better in Esperanto.  
A cry of 'whaaaaah!' came from the next room.  
"Why does she always do that when I'm trying to be romantic?" Rimmer moaned, "I'll be back in a minute."  
He went over to the door, but stopped and turned to face Nikki again.  
"Mi esper la sun no subiri sur nia parenceco," he said, softly.  
What does that mean?"  
"Dunno, something lovey and cheesey in Esperanto."  
Nicole laughed gently, "Thank you."

Ginny dumped a pile of wedding books and magazines down in front of Holly's screen.  
"Geez…" Holly whispered.  
"Hm? What?"  
"I…I don't want to sound like a killjoy, Gin, but…even though the entire population of the universe is going, that's still only a handful of people…"  
"So?" she said, "This is still the only wedding day I plan to have! And I want it to be special."  
"You're getting married to a cat!"  
"Ha, ha," Ginny spoke with a withering look, "Anyway, I've picked out a couple of possible dresses-"  
"A _couple_?" Holly exclaimed, eyeing the waist high stack of mags.  
"Just one or two-"  
"_Hundred_?" Holly interrupted.  
Ginny stood up, "If you don't want to help," she said calmly, "That's fine."  
"No, no, no, I'll be good."  
"Good."

For the next three and a half hours, Holly and Ginny trawled through very little of the magazines, drawing up extensive 'pros and cons' lists about each dress. Holly was finding it hard to keep herself online. Just as they were moving on to the 'Enchantment' styles, Jesse appeared on the screen. It took a great deal of self-control for Holly not to yell, 'Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you!'  
"Hi, honey," she said, "How are you?"  
"A million times better for seeing you…"  
Holly grinned like a little schoolgirl.  
"Awww…!" Ginny clutched a mag to her chest and sighed dreamily, "You two are so sweet!"  
Jesse jolted and looked around, embarrassed - he hadn't known Ginny was there.  
"Er, oh, hi, Gin!" he said with a nervous laugh.  
"Do you want me to go?" Ginny reasoned. The computers smiled at her in a suggestive way and she nodded back, "I thought as much. Thank for the help, Hol."  
"Any time."  
Ginny left the room.  
"Never again!" she sighed at Jesse.  
"That bad?"  
"Worse."  
"Well, I'm here now. I'll make you feel better," he transferred himself to Holly's screen and kissed her lightly.

Holly grinned again, but it gradually faded into a more pensive look.  
"What?" Jesse asked concerned.  
"Oh, nothing, it's just…we've been seeing each other for…some time now, and…I…for a while I've wanted…um…" _For smeg's sake, Holly, spit it out: you want children with him!  
_"Holly?" Jesse had learnt to speak slowly around the senile computer, "Do you want to ask me something?"  
Holly dithered for a while, then yelled out, "Kids! Yes, children!"  
She wasn't sure if it beat the "I used to be a man" fiasco, but it was certainly a close second.  
"Holly?" Jesse asked again, "Do…do you want children? Is that - oh my God - is that why you asked us on board?" his voice was getting frighteningly higher and louder.  
Holly descended into panic, "No, no, no!"  
"It is! You just wanted to use me! Get children out of me!"  
"Jess!"  
"I bet Nicole wasn't even sick. You didn't need lauric acid, you just wanted-"  
"_Jesse!_" Holly interrupted, close to tears, "I just thought I should mention it! I thought it was what we both wanted," she paused, "clearly I was wrong."  
Jesse immediately softened, "Oh, Hol…"  
Holly sniffed and faded out before she let Jesse see her cry. Jesse was left alone to mutter a single word he had picked up during his time on Red Dwarf: "Smeg."

"You were so right!" Lister said as soon as he stepped in the door. Rimmer looked up.  
"What?"  
"You were right! I am completely psyched and ready to be a father."  
"Told you," Rimmer mocked, "I told you you'd come round to it!"  
"How's Kris?" Nicole asked  
"Ecstatic. After the…suddenness of the births, she hasn't really had the chance to celebrate them. But she is now!" Lister jumped in the air and did a strange little dance before sauntering casually out of the room.  
"It's weird," Nicole said after he'd left, "How a child can change a person. You became more responsible and committed; Lister became more…well, I'm not sure how to describe it, really…"


	9. Twice the Turnoff

**Author's note: **Christ, am I tired!

Vitani strode to the supplies cupboard where she knew Kryten would be sorting out the mid-week laundry.  
"Kryten?"  
Inside, Kryten rolled his mech eyes, "What?" he said bluntly.  
"Can I come in?"  
"Sorry, Miss Vitanya," Vitani didn't bother to correct him, "it's…there's not much room in here," he looked around at the vast open spaces. Thank goodness Mister Lister had taught him to lie!  
"Well," she continued, "I'll just say it from out here, then."  
"Fine."  
"I…" she wasn't quite sure how to put this. She knew what she wanted to say but it would be so much easier if she could see his face, "I…I think…"  
"I'm sorry Miss Vitamin, I can't hear you," Kryten felt smug both at his hint for her to leave and the clever twist on her name.  
"Kryten, I love you!" the words came out before she could stop herself. Kryten opened the door before he could stop himself.  
"Excuse me?"  
"Um…" Vitani hadn't a clue how to handle this - she had broken her programming, and the last time she had done so she had damn-near killed herself _and _Ginny.  
"I can save you the explanation, Miss Vitani," Kryten said softly, saying her name correctly for the first time in weeks, "I can see the compatibility rating-"  
"You can?" Vitani's spirits rose, "Oh, Kryten!"  
"Now, hold on," he interrupted, "I'm just saying I see it. I'm not saying I feel it."  
Vitani's mood was sent plummeting back down again. The look on her face, despite all instincts telling him not to, gave Kryten a reason to give her an explanation: "I've been around since the year 2340. Some of my circuits are bound to be a little frayed. Some of my calculation are bound to be a little off. So-"  
"Kryten," it was Vitani's turn to interrupt, "I've been around since 2110. I calculated the compatibility…and I feel it, too. I can't believe that you don't."  
Kryten shifted uncomfortably, "Well, you're just going to have to."  
He turned and went back to the laundry, leaving Vitani to make her way broken-heartedly back to her room.

"I'm determined to walk for this wedding!" Nicole snapped. Rimmer was taken aback - he had only asked her if she wanted a short break. Nicole saw his surprise and shock.  
"Oh, I'm sorry," she apologized, "I'm so, so, sorry."  
"It's OK," Rimmer calmed her, "It's…really, OK."  
"No, it's not, it's not! You're giving me all this help and…I'm just throwing it back in your face!"  
"Honey, I understand. This is hard work!"  
"But I am taking you for granted, though!" she challenged.  
"Well…" he realised there was no point in lying to her, "…yeah. A bit."  
Nicole's face dropped.  
"Look," Rimmer put an arm round her, "why don't we have a five minute break, then come back to this for a bit, then call it quits for the day. OK?"  
Nicole nodded solemnly. Rimmer hugged her close to his body and kissed her on the top of her head, "You're doing so, so well," he whispered. This was all the motivation Nicole needed. She got up out of the wheelchair and walked across the room. And back again. Twice. All the time Rimmer just sat there and watched, open-mouthed with astonishment.  
"How di-? Wha-? But…?" Rimmer jabbered as Nicole gripped onto his arm for support. Out of breath, Nicole just shrugged and grimaced from the effort. Rimmer shook his head, astounded, before wrapping his arms around her. This was all the reward Nicole needed.

She smiled a genuine smile before Holly dissolved onto the screen, computer-generated tears rolling down her cheeks.  
"Jesse…me…argument…" she stuttered.  
"Oh my God! Why?" Rimmer asked, then added, "Not to sound impertinent, of course."  
"I…I said I wanted children," she said in a low tone.  
"Oh smeg…" Nikki ran a hand through her hair as she sat back down, "Do you want me to talk to him?"  
"N-no."  
"Do you want me to talk to him?" Rimmer suggested.  
"Good God, no!" Holly's eyes widened.  
She went to say something else before Ginny danced into the room.  
"Hey! One week until the big day! One week!" she sang to the room. She noticed the solemn looks on the faces of the trio that stood before her, "what's wrong?"  
There was a pregnant pause before Rimmer spoke up, "Holly and Jesse…they…they've had a bit of a falling out."  
"Oh, no," Ginny breathed, "But I thought you guys were perfect for each other…"  
"That's just 'cos we're both floating heads!" Holly yelled, "I bet if we were flesh and body you wouldn't be saying that!"  
"Hol?" Nikki said nervously, "What are you talking about?"  
"Jesse and me! It never would have worked! Let's face it: we're as different as day and night."  
"Yes, but in space that's not an issue," Rimmer said unhelpfully.  
"Shut up, Hat-Rack Head!"  
"Arn, just go," Nikki murmured to her husband.  
"What's that?" Holly asked exaggeratedly, "Am I not important enough to hear that? Hm? Or is it just I'm not important for anything?"  
Holly suddenly seemed to calm. She sighed deeply.  
"You don't need me any more. You've got Jesse. I have no purpose. Remember Queeg?"  
"I wasn't here, then," Ginny said.  
"Nor me," said Nicole.  
"_I_ remember it," Rimmer shuddered.  
"Well, this is like then. Only this is no joke. I'm going."  
"Holly…" Rimmer said desperately.  
"Goodbye," she said quietly before fading out.  
"Holly?" Rimmer began to panic, "Holly, what are you doing? Oh Christ…"  
"What the smeg's going on?" Ginny asked, "And who's this 'Queeg,' character?"  
"Holly!" Rimmer was banging the screen with his fist, by this point, "Holly, don't be stupid!"  
"Arn!" Nicole complained, "What's happ-?"  
"Holly's gonna turn herself off," he stated candidly before running out of the room.

"Kryten, don't do it, man!" Lister argued as he followed the android down the corridor.  
"I must, sir. I cannot live with her. Especially now that…now that…"  
"Now that _what_? Kryten, I wish you'd tell me what's goin' on!"  
"If only I could, sir…"  
"But, you can! You and me, we're amigos! We tell each other _everything_!"  
"We used to, sir," Kryten mumbled.  
"What?"  
"I said, we used to. Until…until _she_ came along. Miss Kochanski with her cottage cheese that _must_ have pineapple chunks in it!"  
"Kryten!" Lister grabbed his arm and spun him round, "I thought you were over that. It's been almost two and a half years."  
"Oh, I know, sir," Kryten sighed, "It's just…it's just _now_…oh, I don't know, sir."  
Lister studied the mechanoid for a moment. His posture - slumped. His voice - despondent. His laundry - not as white as they used to be. Lister had been so busy with the twins he had barely noticed this change in what he could only call his best friend. When had he become this depressive gibbering wreck? Then it clicked; since Vitani had come on board.  
"Kryten," Lister began slowly, "Is their any chance you're blaming Kris because you can't get you're love-life off the runway?"  
"Love-life, sir? What love-life? I'm a series 4000 mechanoid - only the Series 6000 were programmed to feel-"  
"Kryten, for God's sake, I can see it in your eyes, man! You're in love. Big time."  
"No I'm not!" Kryten took a step back, but Lister still kept a hold on him.  
"You are! You're so totally in love!"  
Kryten violently shook off Lister's hand and stormed off, faster than Lister could keep up.  
He was beginning to catch up when Kris happened to pass with Charlotte.  
"Hi!" She said cheerily, "I'm just taking Charlotte back to Nikki and Rimmer. Do you know, she walked today? By herself! Isn't it great news?"  
"Yeah, yeah, great…" Lister muttered anxiously peering down the corridor in possible sight of Kryten.  
"What's wrong?" Kris asked.  
"Kryten's gonna turn himself off," he said grimly before pelting off again.


	10. Things get a bit better

**Author's note:** Sorry about the extremely depressing last chapter! Things get much better in a couple of areas here…honest!

"This is crazy!" Nicole cried after Rimmer, "She wouldn't turn herself off, would she?"  
"You heard what she said," he replied, not slowing his pace, "It'll be Queeg all over again."  
"Who the hell is Queeg?" Nicole and Ginny yelled at the same time.  
"There's no time to explain. We have to stop her!"  
He rounded a corner with Nicole and Ginny just about in tow, although it was hard for them to keep up with the cumbersome wheelchair. He slammed his hand onto the light-sensitive panel which opened the door to the science room and tapped on a keyboard. Jesse's miserable face appeared on the screen.  
"Oh, what do you want?"  
"I think the real question," Rimmer retaliated, "is what do _you_ want."  
"What are you rambling on about now?"  
"Holly," Rimmer said bluntly.  
Jesse sighed. As much as he hated to admit it, Rimmer was right. He loved Holly and pretty much always had. Children just seemed a bit…sudden. He hadn't at all meant to snap at her the way he did. In fact, since being given time to think about it, a child of their own seemed almost…nice. Like he _wanted_ it.  
"It's just..." Jesse said, "It's just not the…not the right time."  
Nicole shook her head sadly. She remembered her own pregnancy, and how Holly had so badly wanted a family. Then they had found Jesse and it seemed her dream would become reality. Now she didn't so much _want_ a family, as she did _need_ a family - after all, her life now depended on it.  
"Come on, Jess," Ginny piped up, "I've never seen you happier than since you've been with Holly," Jesse smiled a little, "and I've never seen you more depressed than since you argued with her."  
Jesse could only nod.  
"Do you want children with her?" Nicole asked gently.  
"Yes, he does," Rimmer said suddenly.  
"What?" came three voices at once.  
"I've seen your memory file, Jess. I hacked into it. All your plainest and most honest emotions shown right there on that screen," he indicated the panel next to him, "Let's face it: there has never been a better time for children than right now."  
Jesse sighed again, but this time it was more jubilated, "You're right," he announced, "You're so right."  
"I am?" Rimmer said, shocked, "er, I mean, I _am_!" he checked himself.  
"Yeah, I'm gonna go talk to her."  
And he disappeared from the screen.  
"You didn't hack into his memory file," Nicole said to Rimmer once he'd gone, "You don't know how."  
"Yes," Rimmer replied, "but _he_ doesn't know that, does he?"  
"Not the most original plan in the world," Nicole laughed, "but it worked!"  
"One question," Ginny raised a hand, "Who here knows how to create computer children?"  
They all looked at each other.  
Ah. That was a good point.  
But Rimmer's suggestion seemed plausible: "Maybe Kryten knows how?"

"Sir, please, you're just suspending an unavoidable act of fate," Kryten reasoned as he chased Lister round the table. He had stolen the chip Kryten needed to logon to his personal user identity and terminate his self.  
"You're just making it harder for yourself when I finally _do_ switch myself off!"  
"You're not _going_ to turn yourself off! I'm gonna make sure of that!"  
"Sir…"  
"_No_, Kryten! You're not going to do it! I won't let you and, frankly, I don't think you have the nerve. It's a stupid decision."  
"Sir, it's _not_ my decision! I'm not of any use to anyone, so I _must _terminate myself!"  
"But Kryters, you _are_ needed! _I_ need ya to keep me sane!"  
"I thought that was Mister Rimmer's job."  
"Not since he found Nikki. And Kris needs ya to help with takin' care of the kids! And…" his voice went dramatically quiet, "Vitani. She needs ya."  
"No she doesn't!" Kryten yelled, "As long as she's taken you all away from me, she'll never need another mechanoid."  
"What?" Lister leaned on the table. Finally, he was getting somewhere, "Taken us away from you?"  
"Well…she _has_."  
Lister shook his head, "Kryten, man. You have _nothing_ to worry about. You will _always_ have a place on this ship."  
Kryten looked away sheepishly.  
"Even if you do deny that you're in love with Vitani."  
Kryten span back round.  
"OK, OK!" Lister said resignedly, "But you _are_ needed. And wanted. Please stay."

"So he's not going to turn himself off?" Kris asked, hopefully. The humans and humanoids had gathered for a meal to celebrate, among other things, Ginny and Cat;s upcoming wedding. Apart from Cat. Despite Ginny being there, he still couldn't stand a social gathering.  
"No, he's not. I talked him round," Lister replied, cradling Bexley in his arms.  
"And Holly's staying, too," Ginny said whilst sewing on the finishing touches on her wedding dress, "And I'm getting married in two days!" she put her hand to her forehand like an old luvvie actor, "What more good fortune could befall this ship?"  
"Guys," Holly said from nowhere, "We'd like you to meet someone…"  
The face of a brown-haired young girl dissolved onto the screen and she smiled, "Hi," she had a distinctive husky voice, like Jesse's, with an unmistakable half-cockney accent, like Holly's, "I'm Kemble."


	11. Things get a lot better

**Author's note: **Well, the title of the chapter says it all, really. R&R please! Oh, and enjoy!

"Hi!" the Cat said smoothly, seeing no reason as to be shocked by this sudden arrival. Everyone else did, though.  
"Holly?" Rimmer said, nervously, "Er, who…who is this?" He had a pretty good idea…  
"My daughter," Holly said, proudly. Rimmer nodded to himself. Yep, he was right.  
There was a long silence.  
"Well, you'd, er, better start to get to know us, Kemble. I'm Kristine-"  
"Kochanski, I know."  
"Wh- how?"  
"Oh, I've studied you're personal files and now I know everything about you! For example, David Lister: parents unknown, IQ unknown, age unknown, found under a pool table in Liverpool."  
"Correct, correct, correct, correct," Lister endorsed.  
"Arnold Judas Rimmer-"  
"Oh, God…" the hologram in question braced himself for the inevitable.  
"Sat and failed thirteen astronavigation exams, three brothers: John, Frank and Howard, died age 31."  
"Sadly…correct," Rimmer testified.  
"Nicole Gloria Adler: wanted to take a navigation course on Earth, but was accidentally sent to Saturn to take a medical course instead."  
Nicole raised her eyebrows, impressed at her knowledge.  
"Also had an affair with one Arnold Judas Rimmer not two and a half years ago."  
"Holly! You promised you'd erased that!"  
Holly gave a small grin, "Sorry, Nik," she said, although she didn't sound sorry. But Nicole didn't mind - she was so pleased to see Holly so happy. And Jesse looked happier, too! Finally, everything was going right!

And most things stayed that way in the run up to the wedding. Although it had to be postponed by a day because of a meteor shower, everyone remained in good spirits. Nicole could finally walk properly (although by the end of the day she was very tired and sometimes needed crutches); Charlotte had begun to take her first steps; Kemble had integrated really well into the crew; and Ginny was hyper about the wedding. Lister was still a little annoyed that Kryten wouldn't admit his true feelings about Vitani, but the twins had started laughing, which was the cutest thing Lister had ever seen, and he soon stopped pestering Kryten about it.  
The morning of the wedding got off to a good start.  
"It's my wedding day! Get up, get up, get up!" Ginny screamed as she pelted into the Rimmers' quarters.  
"Hm, whassa?" Rimmer mumbled rubbing his eyes.  
"I'm getting married today!"  
"Gin," Nicole said, "Just because its past midnight, doesn't mean you have to wake us up yet."  
"But I'm excited!"  
"I know you are. Believe me, I've been there," she said, putting a hand on Rimmer's arm, "but, and trust me on this one, you need your sleep. The last thing you want is to miss out on sleep and end up, oh, I don't know, _falling asleep at the reception_."  
She gave a pointed look in Rimmer's direction.  
"You're right, you're right," Ginny said, "I-I'll go to bed," she illustrated her point by yawning heavily, "Night."  
"Night."  
Rimmer looked at Nicole.  
"I thought you said we would never mention that again!"

Cat fidgeted nervously with one of the levers in Blue Midget with one hand, and his tie with the other.  
"Please, sir," Kryten said nervously, "if you push that too hard in the wrong direction, we'll crash!"  
"Sorry," Cat apologised taking his hand offhis tie,"I'm just…a little…" Cat licked his dry lips - he was going to mess this up. This amazing, gorgeous, fantastic, intelligent woman finally falls in love with him, and he was going to break her heart by ruining the biggest day of her life.  
"Cat," Rimmer offered some rare words of wisdom, "You'll be fine. As long as you're sincere, she won't mind the odd slip. Just don't be, you know, _you_."  
Cat nodded in agreement.  
Blue Midget landed surprisingly well, considering Lister was piloting. They filed out onto the beautiful blue, misty planet that Ginny had chosen for today.

Meanwhile, as Kris put the kids down to nap in Starbug's mid-section, Ginny was also starting to feel the pressure.  
"What of something goes wrong?" she asked for the fifth time.  
"Nothing will go wrong!" Holly, Kemble, Vitani and Kris said in unison.  
"But-"  
"Nothing will go wrong!"  
"Alright!"  
"Stop scrunching your dress so hard!" Kris held Ginny's hands still, "You're going to rip it!"  
"Sorry, sorry, sorry!"  
"Look," Kemble said softly, "We're nearly there. Why don't you go and help Nikki get changed. Mum and I will make sure we get there in one piece."  
Ginny nodded taking deep breaths, "OK…OK…OK…" she wandered to the rear of the 'Bug. The remaining girls looked amongst each other and burst out laughing.  
"Please, tell me I wasn't this bad!" Kris giggled.  
"No. But you were pretty bad," Holly replied, "Remember the fixation you had with the bridesmaid's dress?"  
"What, that was justified! It was a clear two inches too short!"  
"Well, OK, it was a little high at the back, but-"  
"GUYS!" Vitani yelled, but it was too late. The flaming meteor hurtled through space towards them and slammed into the side, knocking Starbug into a collision course with the planet.


	12. Things get much much worse

**Author's note:** I'm so so so so so so so so so so so so sorry. Especially after the euphoria of the last chapter (did you honestly think I was going to sit there and let them have it the _easy_ way?) Anyway, hope you can enjoy this chapter as much as possible! Please R&R, as always!

Kochanski wrestled with the controls, but it was no good. She realised the only thing she could do now was to make sure everyone else was OK.  
"Holly, take control!" She yelled before she ran into the mid-section. Ginny had already scooped up Charlotte and Jim in her arms. The sound of Bexley's screaming was extremely distressing for Kris, but she kept calm and picked her up.  
"Where's Nikki?" Kemble yelled over the whistling engines.  
"In the rear," Ginny replied.  
"Kemble, you need to get to the guys," Kris told her, "they should be on the planet by now."  
"OK. I'll handshake with my dad."  
Within a few seconds she was gone.  
"Kryten!" Vitani exclaimed from the cockpit. Kris scrambled to join her.  
"_Are you all OK? Starbug seems to be going too fast to land,_" came the mechanoid's voice.  
"It's no good!" Vitani said, "We're going to lose contact any second!"  
Kris grabbed the radio, "Kryten, Kemble should be there soon, she'll explain."  
"_Alright, ma'am._"  
Vitani knew this may be her last chance: "Kryten, I really do love you. I never want to leave you-"  
Her words were cut short.

Kryten stared at the radio in disbelief. He had had no idea that she cared about him all that much.  
"Was that…was that really addressed to me?"  
"I don't think that's really the issue, Krytes," Lister said craning his neck up at Starbug careering uncontrollably towards them.  
Kemble suddenly appeared next to her father, "Meteor…Starbug…crash…" she said minimally, but it was all they needed to hear.  
"It's OK, sweetheart," Jesse comforted his daughter. He tried to handshake with Holly, "Oh God," he whispered, "why isn't she responding?"  
"Nik…" Rimmer said under his breath.  
"We've gotta move!" Cat said, "We'll get crushed!"  
They dashed towards Blue Midget and hid under its belly. None of them could watch as Starbug slammed into the surface of the planet.

The boys emerged from their hiding place in a state of shock.  
"Roll call!" Kryten exclaimed, and proceeded to call out Rimmer and Lister's names before Rimmer interrupted.  
"For smeg's sake, Kryten, we know exactly who's missing!"  
The various fires that had erupted were quickly forming into infernos. The green paint flaked and fell to the ground where they were burnt to a black charcoal mess. Starbug shuddered under the strain and moved slightly.  
"This is a nightmare…" Lister whimpered. Suddenly, uncharacteristically, Rimmer leapt up and darted towards the wreckage.  
"Rimmer!" Lister shouted, "You can't go back in there, you'll kill yourself!"  
"It's like you always say, Lister," he shouted back, "I'm a hologram, I'm already dead! Besides, Nikki's too weak! She'll never get out with everyone else!" He pelted off again.  
"I'm goin' in, too," Lister said certainly.  
"Sir, not you as well!" Kryten argued.  
"Kris is still in there! If I don't get her out I'll never see her again!" and he ran off in the direction of Rimmer.  
"I still can't handshake with Holly," Jesse mumbled shakily, "Something's happened to her, I know it has…"  
Kryten saw Vitani's face in his mind. He remembered her last words to him, 'I never want to leave you'.  
"I don't want to leave you either…" Kryten whispered dolefully against a backdrop of explosions.  
"What?" asked Jesse.  
"I need to get Vitani. I need to tell her I love her," Kryten made to go.  
"Kryten, don't be stupid!" Jesse cried, "You'll melt under the heat!"  
"Which is exactly what she's doing right now!" he spoke as he sprinted. Cat turned and looked at the computer.  
"Well," he reacted to the feline's expression, "there's not really a lot I can do to stop you."  
Cat hurled himself towards the fire with screams of, "Ginny, I'm coming, babe!"

Jesse was alone with Kemble for a tense fifteen minutes. He watched the flames stretch higher and higher. He stared intently at the door, concentrating on any movement. His patience was rewarded - he saw a figure. Two figures. Two figures carrying something. It was the two mechanoids carrying Holly's portable screen! He had hope! A minute later, Cat and Ginny scrambled out of the craft and joined them. Not long after that the Listers made an appearance with three children in tow. But Rimmer still hadn't brought Nicole out. This was cause for concern for everyone - he was first to go in; he should have been first to come out.  
"Where is he?" Kemble asked trembling.  
"He was right behind me when I left the room!" Kris said.  
One of Cat's ears pricked as he heard a creaking noise, then the other. It got louder and louder until everyone could hear it. The pitch got lower until it sounded more like a cracking sound.  
"It's not gonna hold," Lister said bluntly, staring at Starbug's wreckage as everyone else did, "They're finished."  
As if on cue, a bulk of Starbug's roof fell in on itself and shattered on its floor, sending licks of flames in the Dwarfer's direction. They cowered for safety, Kris hugging Charlotte tight to her muttering, "It'll be OK, it'll all be OK…"


	13. Support Urgently Needed

**Author's note:** Wow. I'm really depressing, aren't I? I'm so sorry, but it doesn't get ANY better for the Red Dwarf crew in this chapter. Something _really_ nice happens in the next one, and the one after that is the last one. Phew! I wish I'd never started this fanfic now!

Rimmer stumbled through Starbug, or what was left of it, searching for Nicole. He shouted her name, but he was sure she couldn't hear him over the top of the deep thundering noises of Starbug's decaying frame and the high-pitched whistling of the ruptured engines. He glanced at the various thermostats and saw the temperatures flickering dangerously near the red zone. He searched everywhere; the cockpit, the mid-section, the engine room, the sleeping quarters. He wanted to search the rear-section but a huge part of Starbug's structure had caved in on itself and made it inaccessible. Then he got that horrible sinking feeling.  
He ran over to the metal wall that separated himself from his wife and hit it a couple of time, fruitlessly. He thought for a moment, then winced and plunged his hand into his stomach. He located the light-bee and switched himself to soft-light. He stepped easily through the hunk of metal that was obstructing his way. The room was filled with smoke and it was oven-hot. He took a few tentative steps forward, but he couldn't see a thing. This was a major problem, as his touch was impaired. _Think, Rimmer, think! _Smoke rose, he knew that. He dropped to the floor as low as he could without going through the floor. He crawled along, instinctively blinking away the smoke from his eyes. And he saw her.

It was all like a vivid nightmare. She was lying on the floor, unconscious, her arm was clearly broken, and her leg was trapped under a hefty piece of rubble. Now he had a problem. He reasoned that the rubble was light enough to move, but as he had converted himself to soft-light he couldn't do so, or even pick her up. He couldn't even touch his light-bee to convert himself to hard-light.  
He had a tough decision to make. Either he stayed with her and hoped someone would come for them; or he left her to find help, running the risk of the entirety of Starbug collapsing on top of her. He lay down beside her: if they were to die, they were to die together.

"Why isn't he getting out of there?" Lister said edgily, hopping from one foot to the other. Ginny took a deep shuddering breath and buried herself deeper into Cat's chest. He hugged her close to him, trying any way he could to comfort her. But it was hard. The truth was, even _he_ was worried.  
Suddenly the earth beneath Starbug's feet gave way and collapsed, taking a lot of the ship with it. A huge tear in the breech/hull weakened and split the craft in two. One half rolled safely back to its original position. Kris's tears rolled silently down her face as the other half tipped over and crashed into the planet's surface. It instantly caught alight. Anything - or anyone - trapped inside wouldn't stand a chance.

Inside, Rimmer looked at Nicole, whispered, "I love you," then scrunched his eyes shut. It would be easier if he didn't _see_ her die…


	14. Reminiscing

**Author's note:** Aw, I don't like this chapter, just cos everyone's so depressed! But try to enjoy it, anyway!

Rimmer stepped into the room, his soft-light feet not making a sound. His breath caught in his throat as he saw all the tubes connecting a hundred machines to Nicole. She looked so pale and ill. The heart monitor bleeped routinely in the background. But at least she was alive.  
Just.  
Their rescue had been amazing. Pretty much everybody had played a part in it: Kryten had found them whilst Cat and Ginny had stabilized Starbug; Vitani and Lister had carried out Nicole whilst Holly and Kemble tried their hardest to fix Rimmer's lightbee; Kris had taken the children back to the safety of Blue Midget whilst Jesse started the ship up in readiness.  
Of course, Rimmer had been unconscious for most of this.

As Rimmer walked towards his comatose wife, Holly turned him into hard-light form, but he didn't even notice. He sat by Nicole's bed and held her hand. He had been in this position many times before - with Nicole's panic attacks, when she was ill whilst she was pregnant, the disease she had contracted shortly after giving birth - it all came flooding back. A single hologrammatic tear rolled down his cheek. Then other memories fogged his mind. The first time he was shouted at by his mother; the first time he was beaten by his father; being patronized by his brothers, his teachers, anyone who knew him for more than three days; all the put-downs from Lister; every time he had had to say goodbye to Nikki so she could go back to her 'proper' boyfriend. And now this. Was the universe _completely_ against him? He put the back of his hand to his mouth to stop himself crying, but it didn't work. Small sobs rapidly spiraled into uncontrollable shuddering gasps. He rested his head on Nicole's stomach. He barely noticed Kryten walk in.  
"Sir?"  
Rimmer jumped and looked up.  
"Um, sir, I er, I need to examine Miss Rimmer."  
Rimmer sniffed, nodded and got up.  
"You can stay, if you like, sir," Kryten said.  
"I don't want to," Rimmer said shakily, "If…if…" he trailed off and began to turn towards the door.

Cat knocked on the door and opened it coming face to face with Rimmer. He looked terrible. Ginny rushed forward, "Oh my God, what's wrong? Its not Nikki is it? Has something happened? Is she-"  
"No!" Rimmer interrupted before Ginny said 'dead', "What do you want?" he asked a little more rudely than he'd intended.  
"Well, me and Ginny," Cat began, "We've…we've been thinking and…we thought we ought to run it by you before we go ahead with it."  
"What?"  
"We've decided to get married…now."  
"Oh," Rimmer replied, "Well, that's fine by me. And I'm sure Nikki would want life to go on," he brushed a stray piece of hair from her forehead, "Besides, it'll be a nice surprise for when she wakes up."  
Ginny and Cat looked at each other. They both knew that '_if_ she wakes up' was far more realistic a sentence.  
Ginny put a hand on Rimmer's shoulder, "As long as you're sure."  
Rimmer nodded.  
"Do you think you'll come?" Ginny asked.  
Rimmer shrugged. He honestly didn't know. If Nicole was stable by the time of the wedding he saw no reason as to not go. But if she was still like this - or worse - he wasn't sure if he would be strong enough to leave her.  
"We'll see…"


	15. Almost perfect wedding

**Author's note: **'Almost perfect wedding'. Too right.

Since the accident, Kryten and Vitani didn't have many chances to talk, but they found time between looking after Nicole, the odd babysitting job and preparing for Cat and Ginny's wedding.  
"I'm glad things worked out between us, Krytie," Vitani said one night as they watched 'The Maltese Falcon', the version in which Humphrey Bogart's part had been replaced by Porferon, the most famous actor-droid of his time. Vitani had never been a huge fan of 1940's films, but she had to admit, Kryten's remarkably accurate insights into them had made them a lot more enjoyable.  
"I'm glad, too," he replied hugging her closer, "To think I hated you when you first joined!"  
Vitani just smiled and nodded. She knew as well as he did that he had loved her from the first time he met her. It was jealousy that got in the way. But she wasn't prepared to fall out over it. At that point Cat entered the room.  
"Cat!" she cried, "Ever heard of knocking?"  
"I don't care!" he said practically jumping up and down, "We're getting married! Tomorrow!"

So, for the third time, Cat and Ginny prepared for their wedding. They had opted for the simple option, this time, and chosen to marry in the Observation Dome. Everyone felt the room was a little empty without Rimmer and Nicole, but they tried to enjoy the day as much as possible.  
"Dearly beloved," Kris began, "we are gathered here today to celebrate the love that Ginny Carver and Cat…" she paused, "Er, just Cat, er…er…share," She recovered scattily, "er, so, um, lets…"  
"Vows," Holly whispered from the side.  
"Right! Yes, er, Cat?" she gestured to Cat.  
"Ginny," he said read from the card Lister had prepared for him, "As anyone in this room will tell you my patience runs thin easily, but I was more than happy to give you three wedding days until you got the one you wanted. Because I love you. I know the road of love is sometimes hard and preco…preccy…pre…"  
"Precarious," Lister coughed.  
"What he said," Cat said, "but as long as we're there together, I couldn't care less. I love you, Gin. And I hope someday I'll make you as happy as you did on the first day I met you."  
Ginny smiled and let the tear roll down her cheek, "I'm not following that!" she joked, "All I'll say is…I love you too. I always have, and I always will."  
That was all Cat needed to hear. He put his hand behind her neck and pulled her into a kiss. Kris was startled, "Er, you may now kiss the bride? I now pronounce you husband and wife."  
"Kris?" Holly said, "Rings?"  
"Oh, smeg, OK, right. Um, who has the rings?"  
Nobody moved. Kris moved over to Lister and said meaningfully, "Who. Has. The rings?"  
"Oh, yeah, that's me!" Lister said and handed the rings to her. Kris took a deep breath, walked back to the couple and handed them a ring each. They slipped the rings on each other's fingers with huge grins on their faces.  
"_Now_ I pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride, er, again."  
But he already was…

Suddenly, Rimmer burst through the door.  
"Kryten!" he yelled, "Kryten, something, I don't know, something's happened! Follow!"  
and as quickly as he'd arrived, he'd disappeared again. The Dwarfers exchanged nervous glances amongst themselves. Jesse spoke up, "Well lets go then!"  
They met Rimmer in the MediBay. Nicole's heart monitor was beeping rapidly - _too_ rapidly - and her face appeared even more drawn and lifeless.  
"I need to look over her," Kryten said. Everyone nodded, "In private," he added. They got the hint and filed out, Lister putting a supportive arm around Rimmer.  
"I'm sure she'll be fine!" Lister comforted Rimmer as he watched him hug his precious daughter protectively, "She's always pulled through in the past, right?"  
"Right…" Rimmer mumbled. He didn't sound convinced.

"It appears that as she inhaled the smoke from the accident, she lined her lungs with a thick layer of tar which prohibited her ability to breathe. She's only surviving because of the oxygen supply we're giving her," Kryten explained.  
"What are you saying, Kryten?" Rimmer asked, absolutely certain that he didn't want to know.  
"She…she will never have a normal life, sir. If you choose to let her live she will live until the oxygen supply runs out-"  
"Woah!" Rimmer interrupted, "What do you mean by 'if I choose to let her live'?"  
"Sir. She won't…I mean, she…she'll never wake up."  
Rimmer stared at the droid processing his words in his head. _She'll never wake up_. Now what was he going to do?


	16. Love changes everything

**Author's note: **I hate this fanfiction from start to finish. One hell of a bugger to write. HATE IT HATE IT HATE IT!  
But do tell me what _you_ think… :) Sorry about the lame ending, but I can't think!

"I can't make this decision!" Rimmer yelled, "What am I supposed to do?"  
Everyone smiled sympathetically.  
"That wasn't a rhetorical question! I really need your help!"  
"Honey," Kris said, "There really is nothing we can do or say to help. I'm sorry to say it, but it is entirely your decision."  
"I was afraid of that," Rimmer sighed and started pacing the room again.  
"You do that too much and you'll wear a groove in the floor!" Lister remarked. Rimmer shot him a glance, "Sorry, that's…not important. Sorry."  
Rimmer went back to pacing, "Look, I don't care if it's the worst suggestion in the universe, _anything_ is better than _nothing_, OK?"  
Silence.  
"OK," Holly piped up, "OK, I have a suggestion."  
"Yes!" Rimmer cried, "Oh, thank you, what is it?"  
"You won't like it. It's a bit of a crude way to make this huge choice."  
"Don't care, tell me."  
"Draw up a benefits list. Analyse and compare the two options. I mean, I know it won't be easy but-"  
"No, no! That sounds reasonable," Rimmer interrupted, "Thanks."  
"OK," Kemble took control, "Lets say we keep Nikki on the life support machine. What are the benefits?"  
"Well, she'd be alive, for one thing. And I could see her every day."  
"What about the benefits of…letting her go?"  
"Charlotte wouldn't have to grow up seeing her mother on that machine every day. And…she wouldn't be suffering any more."  
There was an expectant pause.  
"Arnold," Vitani said gently, "we won't judge you on any decision you make."  
"Its not you I'm worried about…it's me."  
He knew he'd never forgive himself, whatever decision he made…

Rimmer entered the MediBay and saw his wife for what he knew would be the last time. He couldn't believe he was having to say goodbye to her. To the one person who had ever truly understood him. To the one person who had ever truly loved him. To the mother of his child. It was hard for him to accept that everything they had been through had been in vain - all the time they spent trying to conceive Charlotte; all the time they spent trying to get Nicole walking again; every problem they'd ever had to overcome seemed so trivial now. He sat beside her and cupped her chin in his hand.  
"I always knew I had to outlive you, being a hologram. But…I kind of figured we'd have a _little_ more time together than _this_. I'm not happy about this decision. Trust me on this one: it's for the best. I know what its like to be dependant on a machine; I know its horrible. So I also know that you'll be much happier…" he swallowed, "You'll be much happier when…when…" he couldn't say it. He had to do this quickly, or he wouldn't do it at all, "I'll look after Charlotte, I promise. I won't let her forget you. And I won't forget you," he could swear he saw her blink at him, but dismissed it. She was in a _coma_, she couldn't _move_! He slipped his hand into hers and squeezed it tight, "Goodbye, Nik. I love you so much."  
His mind was playing tricks on him - it felt like she squeezed his hand back. But it was impossible.  
"I love you…" he repeated one more time.  
It wasn't an illusion this time. She tilted her head towards him and groaned a little.  
"Nikki?"  
Her eyes fluttered open for a split-second.  
"Smegging hell!" Rimmer jumped out of his seat.

One minute he was saying his final goodbyes, the next she was having a coughing fit right in front of him.  
"Um…" was all he could mutter. He suddenly saw specks of black on the contrasting white sheets. She was coughing up the tar! If she got rid of enough of it, she might have a chance of life! Rimmer put his arm around her back and propped her up.  
"That's it, sweetheart, keep going, that's it!"  
Hot tears were streaming down her face.  
"What's happening?" she got enough breath to squeak.  
"Don't worry, everything's fine," Rimmer comforted her, delighted to hear her voice, "Just keep coughing."  
"I can't," she said weakly.  
"You can!"  
She summoned all her energy and wretched, bringing up what seemed like half a tankful of fuel. Rimmer had to look away.

Five agonizing minutes later, she stopped coughing and fell back onto the pillow. Rimmer immediately grabbed for the oxygen mask. She grabbed it gratefully and clamped it to her mouth taking deep, gratifying breaths. Rimmer finally had a chance to step back and realise what had just happened, and he couldn't believe it. No matter how many times he repeated it in his head or saw her lying there, it wouldn't click in his mind: Nicole was alive and well.  
"That's better," she said, bringing Rimmer out of his trance. Her voice was hoarse and very quiet, but it was unmistakably her.  
"Do you want a drink?" Rimmer asked her without even thinking.  
"Yes, please," she replied rubbing her chest with her palm. Rimmer robotically poured her a glass of water and handed it to her. She sipped it and winced as she swallowed it.  
"I'm…gonna get Kryten," Rimmer said monotonously. He turned and walked to the door.

The others were waiting silently outside. No one had dared say a word; even the babies had stayed quiet. There was an eerie atmosphere as Rimmer stepped through the door. They looked at him expectantly, waiting for the inevitable.  
"She's alive," he said simply. They stared at him in shock.  
"What?" Holly exclaimed, "How can that be?"  
"Are you sure?" Lister asked.  
"Positive," Rimmer replied, "She…she coughed up the tar in her lungs…I think…I…I don't know!" hearing himself say it had brought him back down to earth a little and the sheer enormity of the situation was hitting him. _She was alive!_

That night, everyone was in a daze. Everything had happened so fast. Rimmer spent the night, and many consecutive nights, in the MediBay with Nicole, barely leaving her side. Within a week there was a noticeable improvement, and Kryten said it was OK for her to go back to her quarters, as long as she rested. Two months later, things had pretty much returned to normal.

Well, actually, they hadn't. Even despite the little things (Jim and Bexley taking their first steps; Charlotte saying her first word; Nicole recovering) things would never return to the way it used to be. Kryten and Cat had both found reciprocated love. Lister, Holly and Rimmer had had four children between them. And the crew had more than doubled. They were no longer a ragamuffin bunch of misfits - they were a fully fledged group of friends. Because of love, the crew of the Red Dwarf were beginning to rebuild society.


End file.
